M Burmese

I say good bye to a lot of refugee families... for different reasons- people I have known well, and people who I have not known really at all- yesterday I said good-bye to a family that I will truly miss- one that likely will never know, this side of heaven, how they have impacted my life.

The M Burmese have been on my heart for a while. When they first arrived it was in the midst of the September rush and very few of the families got our very best attention, because so many families came at once. There were 4 M Burmese families that arrived in my area that month- and of those, only one got a legitimate WP volunteer. The others received odds and ends.When they arrived the mosque surrounded them with help initially, as it was near Ramadan. The mosque actually stuck around longer that I expected, based on past experience- which was very bitter sweet. Sweet, from a purely sociological perspective because the families needed help and support and the church was no where to be found, or rather, to be fair, the church otherwise engaged in meaningful things. Bitter because the M Burmese became very suspicious of the local church and were warned against us. I had only one opportunity to meet any of these families and that was to bring a father and his grown daughter some laundry soap and blankets. They seemed very suspicious of me- it was the very first, and only time that I had not been invited in to a home.

It all happened so fast in September, when I had the opportunity to look back, I realized that with limited resources and high needs it seemed as though "chance" was against the M Burmese. . All of the "solid" volunteers somehow ended up matched with Karen. There was no intentional neglect, by any means, it just so happened that at the end of the day when the straws were drawn the M Burmese always seemed to come up with the shortest one. I don't know how or why it happened. When it comes to matching WPs, especially in September, it is mostly a numbers game- who is ready when and what family comes on that day.

I became very burdened for them shortly after this realization and when I saw how uninterested they were in meeting Americans who were not Muslim, I really felt though I had a part in failing them. I was thankful that at least they were getting some help, from a social service point of view, but saddened that there was no room for Light. I shared this with my small group and we prayed for them on a few occasions. I have been praying for God to raise people up to reach out to them- the right people-people who could handle a little rejection :) and praying for opportunities to befriend them.

Well, in January, word reached me that one of the families was looking for a volunteer to tutor their kids and 2 of the families needed help with taxes. I met with the families, who were very happy to have volunteers and passed the info on to my coworker, who had some volunteers ready. There are now 3 solid volunteers meeting with these families.

A few weeks ago I introduced a very committed volunteer to two of the families. At our first meeting we learned that Ha Se Na and her husband O'Sman would be leaving soon. They would move in with O'Sman's relatives in another state. I asked them why the relatives would not come here instead, and Ha Se Na replied, “They have sponsors there, volunteers that help then and they don't want to leave them.” (ouch)Over the last few weeks their new volunteer has been visiting with the families 3-5 times a week, helping them close out accounts, buy tickets, eating lots of curried food and developing a friendship. I have had the opportunity form time to time to see how the friendship is growing between the volunteer and the families. It is truly amazing.

Yesterday I was invited to join them for lunch and Ha Se Na was talking about leaving and how Mar Ree Ahn (single daughter of the other family) would be alone once she left. They were very sad and she hoped more Burmese would come soon to her area. Then she said something like “ When we came here, we were the first family and we didn’t have any friends- for two weeks I cried in my apartment, then some Africans met us and we became friends, then the Muslims came and visited for a little while, but they left. Now today I told O'Sman I don’t want to move, I don’t want to leave my new friends, my African friends and my teachers, I will miss them very much and so I was crying.” She said something about how having these new friends, and this type of help earlier on would have been much better. Broke my heart clean in half….

Ha Se Na and O'Sman were the one family who did received a WP. I remember that they came in late and they never met their WP volunteer. When I talked to the volunteer about at least coming back once and welcoming them she told me, in no uncertain terms that she was too busy to ever come back and visit this family.

I understand fully that a lot of people don't come back for many reasons. We live in the season of "first serves" and Americans fear commitment so we like to do "one time things" which is why my job exists. I totally get that. I love that my job is centered around walking through this "first serve" experience with volunteers with the hopes of turning it into more. It is a scary thing to reach out to someone from another culture, even if it is for a one time event. I remember my first time, I can appreciate the fear and anxiety that goes along with doing a WP.

I love to see the look on the volunteers faces as we walk out the door, and they say "What about...? How will they...? and I say to them "It is different when they have faces, isn't it?" The volunteers are touched, they are moved- at least for the next 20 minutes or so. I don't get it- and yet I do, I am ashamed to say- Maybe if we weren't so inundated with "faces"- would that help? How is it so easy for us as Americans to walk away from Ha Se Na's and let them cry out of loneliness int their apartments for 2 weeks? People like Ha Se Na and O'sman, who have lost everything, fled violent men with machetes, lost friends and family and come to America, which is wonderful, but was not the plan they had for their lives at all. How are we able, myself included, to look in the face of suffering and say "Oh, that is sad, I hope it works out- Dear Jesus, help them" and walk away. It shouldn't be this easy, it really shouldn't.

It's not that we should live in guilt and shame of our privileged place in life- we are the redeemed, that is no way to live- I don't know that responding out of guilt is really all that God honoring in the end any ways. I think a response should come more out of what Grace has been given to us. You know, the one who has been given much, loves much etc...

Imagine if we could reach out to the world with the love of Christ by helping someone read their mail- or driving them to the grocery store. Imagine if we could love Jesus more by giving up just a few hours of our week to hang out with some people and just be friends. What would that be like? No need to raise a thousand bucks to drive to Mexico for a week and build a house and get that mountain top experience that may last 25 (!) minutes (though, please lets do that as well)- just a 20 minute to an hour drive and living life with people who simply need a friend. Maybe it could change our lives too- and for more that 20 minutes. Imagine that.

As for Ha Se Na and O'Sman, I pray with confidence that there is someone at their destination ready to pick up where their volunteer here left off when he dropped them at the airport this morning- someone who is ready to continue to build that friendship that reflects Christ's love for them. He did not rescue them in this life only to abandon them.